I will help you write your wedding toast

The "Raise A Glass Package" (I really like that name) is whatever you want it to be. Come to me with a full draft or nothing at all, it doesn't matter. If you need a judgement-free buddy to practice in front of, I can listen. If you are not sure if that raunchy joke will land, I can tell you. If you are a close friend of the groom but a terrible writer, I am happy to write the whole thing for you. Ultimately, I am here to help you tell your story about your buddy in your voice with confidence, absent any cheesy wedding cliches. No AI, ever.

I am only charging $5 because I love social storytelling, so while this kind of thing may be terrifying for you, it is fun (even therapeutic) for me. Weddings are already expensive, so if a $5 places a heavy financial burden on you, I am willing to discuss a pro-bono option. Regardless, if you are unsatisfied for any reason, I will promptly return your $5.

Because I have a "real" job elsewhere, I will only be able to take calls late on weeknights, but am very flexible on the weekends. Call/text me at 301-741-2774.

P.S. I also offer a "Lower the Casket" package for funeral speeches. I am willing to advise on other speech occasions as well.